Saturday, December 20, 2008
And then there’s the deeper panic: are we ready for this, will we ever have alone time, will we still be able to develop our marriage, hang out with friends, eat in peace, will we survive the lack of sleep, will we be good parents, will I feel good and recover quickly so I can actually enjoy my baby, will we bond well, will I be successful at breastfeeding (and will I care too much if I’m not), can we really do this??????
It’s too late now – and we’re running out of time - only ten weeks and five days left! I feel compulsive urges to do things we won’t be able to do easily after the baby’s born – sleep late, snuggle with Tony, hang breakable ornaments at the bottom of the tree, shop at stores with narrow aisles and lots of breakables, sew and scrapbook with the door open regardless of the time of day, go do things with Tony and friends, just hang out with no responsibilities.
So little time left – only ten weeks and five days till my due date!!!!!
Ok, those are the panicky thoughts that just crossed my mind. I know deep inside that it’s really ok if most of these things don’t get done, and I know which ones I really want to do, and I know I’ll be able to do the most important ones in time. I also know everyone has fears about becoming new parents, and while some of them might be realized, God will help us adjust and enjoy it. I just had to have a moment of panic there :)
The other half of me can't wait and is really excited to be so close - the part that wants to hold and snuggle my baby, the part that can't wait to meet Cadence, the part that is done with heartburn and sideaches, the part that looks forward to having a bundle of fun and excitement around, the part that wants to try her hand at being the best mommy she can be - that part is getting more hyper and excited every day we come closer to our due date. Only ten weeks and five days!
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Ok, we had our ultrasound today, and everything is looking great. She's still right on track for her due date and measuring like she's supposed to. The ultrasound said she weighs 2 lbs 14 ounces, but the lady that did it for us said it could be a few pounds more or less than that.
We did learn a few things about Cadence today:
- She's camera shy. Everytime the 4-D thing got close to her she turned her head back and forth and put her hands in front of her eyes.
- She sticks out her tongue a lot.
- She never stops wiggling!
- She also appears to never shut her mouth (go figure with us for parents!) :)
- She still has her poochie belly, and nice round cheeks, as well as a double chin!
Kari's friend did the ultrasound, and she printed us lots of pictures, but I only had time to scan my favorites today. Here they are:
This is her profile, with her cute little nose -
Here she looks like she's smiling :) -
In this one you can kind of see her tongue sticking out, and she's rubbing her left eye (both of which she did off and on the whole time we were there) -
On a totally different note, I had to go to Kohls yesterday to buy a gift card for someones Christmas, and while I was there I discovered something very... um... interesting... about myself. *Drum roll*
I have been in certain retail bathrooms so many times, I can tell you which stalls are missing their coathangers.
Pathetic, I know.
Ok, I think that is enough randomness for one day, now to fill everyone in on the boring details of our life.
This afternoon we are going to have an ultrasound, so I'll try to post pictures of Cadence sometime soon. Speaking of Cadence, she's big enough and strong enough now we can watch her moving around at night. It's really funny.
My last day at work will officially be January 16th. I say official because I'm scheduled to help with a party in the library the next week, my shower is the week after that, and I'm planning to help with bookfair the week after that, and ... well, you get the point.
Tony had his concerts last week, and they both went really well. I'll have to try to remember to put some pictures up here. I finally got to sit off to the side of the orchestra, so I got to watch Tony conduct for the first time. It was pretty neat, I really enjoyed it.
Well, I'm going to stop typing and go do some desperately needed housework - hope everyone has a great week gearing up for Christmas!
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Monday, December 8, 2008
I have been thinking a lot about submission recently, and studying it, because it has always been a hard topic for me. Being a Christian, I feel Biblically compelled to submit to my husband. Being human, and raised to be very independant, I don't always want to. However, the more I study true submission, the easier it becomes.
First of all, I have a Godly companion, who is always willing to listen to my input and has never (that I can remember) just "laid down the law". Our normal course of action is to discuss things (sometimes mildly heatedly :)) and then decide together what to do. Submission comes in when I don't totally agree with what he is saying, but I can go with his way because he is the head of the household, I love him, and I know that's what I need to do.
Secondly, it was once pointed out to me by a very wise man (Papa) - there is a HUGE difference between submission and obedience. There is even a difference between submission and giving in. My favorite definition of submit from any dictionary I've used is this - to offer oneself of one's free will; to defer to another's wishes, opinions, etc. It makes it clear that when you submit, you are not just obeying because they told you to and you feel you have no choice. You are WILLINGLY defering to their wishes, WILLINGLY defering to their opinions. You are offering your whole self to their guidance and judgement. This makes submission so much easier for me, because it makes it something I choose to willingly give my husband becuase I respect him and love him. Sometimes when I don't wholeheartedly agree with Tony, I remind myself - I wouldn't have married him if I didn't trust him to take care of me. He didn't take me free will. I gave it to him.
To me, that is what true submission is all about. Giving yourself freely to someone else.