Saturday, December 20, 2008

Ten Weeks and Five Days

Ten weeks and five days till my due date – AAAAAA!!!!!! There’s so much I want to get done: a quilt, some clothes, a pregnancy scrapbook, a baby scrapbook, cooking, decorating, curtains, shopping, showers – eek! There’s so much I feel I need to get done before she’s born – stock up on groceries and easy frozen meals, take all those classes we’re signed up for, read those dreaded last chapters of my pregnancy books about labor and delivery, pack for the hospital, make a list of who all will want a phone call as soon as the baby is born, make a list for the birth announcements, settle on whether to make or buy announcements and then do it, and the list goes on and on.
And then there’s the deeper panic: are we ready for this, will we ever have alone time, will we still be able to develop our marriage, hang out with friends, eat in peace, will we survive the lack of sleep, will we be good parents, will I feel good and recover quickly so I can actually enjoy my baby, will we bond well, will I be successful at breastfeeding (and will I care too much if I’m not), can we really do this??????
It’s too late now – and we’re running out of time - only ten weeks and five days left! I feel compulsive urges to do things we won’t be able to do easily after the baby’s born – sleep late, snuggle with Tony, hang breakable ornaments at the bottom of the tree, shop at stores with narrow aisles and lots of breakables, sew and scrapbook with the door open regardless of the time of day, go do things with Tony and friends, just hang out with no responsibilities.
So little time left – only ten weeks and five days till my due date!!!!!

Ok, those are the panicky thoughts that just crossed my mind. I know deep inside that it’s really ok if most of these things don’t get done, and I know which ones I really want to do, and I know I’ll be able to do the most important ones in time. I also know everyone has fears about becoming new parents, and while some of them might be realized, God will help us adjust and enjoy it. I just had to have a moment of panic there :)

The other half of me can't wait and is really excited to be so close - the part that wants to hold and snuggle my baby, the part that can't wait to meet Cadence, the part that is done with heartburn and sideaches, the part that looks forward to having a bundle of fun and excitement around, the part that wants to try her hand at being the best mommy she can be - that part is getting more hyper and excited every day we come closer to our due date. Only ten weeks and five days!

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