Wednesday, January 14, 2009

How to Check Out a Book - Fourth Grade Style


1. Get bored of class.
2. Rummage through your desk to find the book you shoved in behind your math textbook when you came back from the library an hour ago.
3. Ask to go to the library because the book you checked out was too long/ too short / too hard / below your reading level / too boring / etc.
4. Run to the library with several of your friends, talking and laughing all the way through the school.
5. Arrive at the library in a flurry of noise and chaos, throw your book in the book drop and rush towards the shelves.
6. Play hide and seek / fight over books / ask your friends who they like / tease small children.
7. Randomly touch and knock over books as you pass them so it sounds like you’re diligently searching for the just the right book.
8. Try not to roll your eyes while the librarian / library assistant / volunteer tells you running and fighting are not appropriate library behaviors.
9. In an effort to appease said library staff, ask if they have any funny books.
10. Look at every funny book they show you with vague disinterest and distain, then wander off to play with the atlas.
11. Pull out every magazine to choose your very favorite, then remember you still have a magazine in your desk and shove them all randomly back in boxes.
12. Interrupt any classes going on in the library by yelling or going directly to the teacher and talking to them in the middle of their sentences.
13. Realize 20 / 30 / 40 minutes have passed, and your teacher said to be back in 10 minutes.
14. Grab first book you see on shelf that does not have a plain green cover.
15. Go to the check-out desk, pull up your account, and give excuses about the book you destroyed by shoving it in your desk / leaving it on the playground overnight / fighting over with a friend.
16. Check out book.
17. Get half-way to door and realize your friend hasn’t chosen a book yet.
18. Throw your book in the check-in slot and run over to where your friend is lingering.
19. Argue over who has the hottest girlfriend / crush / best football game.
20. Get shushed by librarian.
21. Repeat steps 13 through 16.
22. Run down hall to class.
23. Get to class and realize your book is not even in your reading level and is 500 pages long.
24. Oh well, you can always go to the library again in ten minutes when you change classes.

Needless to say, we’ve had a lot of problems with fourth grade students in the library this year… One boy hit the nail on the head today – I asked them why they liked the library, and his response? I don’t really, it just gets me out of class time. If they actually read the books they checked out, I would love to see them five times a day… as it is… not so much J Oh well, the rest of my job more than makes up for it!

1 comment:

Kristina said...

I am laughing. Gabriel would be offended that someone would act like that in a LIBRARY. :) He recently said that he would love to work in a LIBRARY and that being around the books would be payment enough.